Over the past decade, anal sex —or at least, talking about anal sex—has become ificantly less taboo, perhaps because butts have taken on an entirely new status thanks, social media!
But the thing is, anal sex can oftentimes become the preferred method for women who don't have vaginas, for those for whom vaginal penetration is especially painful, and for women who simply experience more pleasure that way, Clarke explains.
For some women, it's is the cherry on top of a sexual sundae: a little extra treat that elevates something that was already delicious on its own talking about sex here. If you've yet to add anal to the menu but are curious to taste test it, there are some things you should know first:. Before your first go, you'll also want to peep these stories from women who have dabbled in butt sex and lived to tell the tale. Read on, and let their experiences guide yours.
We did it not because we were bored with our sex life, but because neither of us had ever done it, and we wanted to 'have a first' together. He had slept with a lot of women in his teens and early 20s, so I loved the idea of doing something with him that he'd never done before.
We talked about it for months before finally going through with it. It wasn't really planned, but one night after we both had a couple of drinks, we started hooking up in my bedroom, and he whispered in my ear, 'Should we try it? We slathered ourselves in lube—I'd always heard that you need to use way more than you think you do—then had him enter very slowly, like, centimeter by centimeter, in the doggy position.
Within about five minutes, he was pretty far inside, and it felt like nothing I'd experienced before—a fullness that made me feel like I'd never had sex before. What made the whole thing that much better was how he kept asking if I was okay and the look of sincere and utter pleasure on his face, as if he was having an otherworldly experience, too.
1. communicate your concerns
We made a ton of eye contact—I liked turning my head and watching him lose himself to the pleasure—and we kissed a lot as he got close to coming. Despite my nerves, I actually orgasmed, too I rubbed my clit to put myself more at ease. It was the most intimate night of my life. We did it a handful of times after that on 'special occasions' I have a fear of stretching out, haand all were amazing, but none can compare to that first-time feeling.
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Speaking of orgasms, there's a lot you might not know about them Fortunately, I enjoyed myself and had a positive experience overall. I began to realize that I liked the feeling and got pleasure from it. Now in my current long-term relationship, it's one of the activities in the rotation. Most important, you need to properly warm up. Just like a vagina, it is easier and more pleasurable when the hole is ready to go.
Proper foreplay is essential—bring in lube, fingers, mouth, toys, whatever you prefer. It could take more time than vaginal sex. I think of anal as the second course, because it's better once you're already excited and feeling great. My advice is to trust your body, and if you feel up for it, go for it! I was incredibly comfortable with him, but using lube would have made it a more pleasant experience for both of us, since there is no natural lube.
I would recommend doing it with someone who you feel comfortable with because it definitely is a much more vulnerable area. We were in a place where we were comfortable with each other and eager to explore more, so one day, we tried it out of curiosity.
I did some research beforehand just to make sure we would both be safe and comfortable doing it. The first time we did it, we used a generous amount of lube and made sure to prepare first.
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It was definitely interesting for both of us and something neither of us had done before. After that we only tried it one more time, and we ultimately decided it wasn't something that we wanted to continue doing. It was more special doing it with my partner rather than a random hookup, because I felt safe and comfortable throughout all of it.
But if you're not and you do it nice and slowly, it's euphoric. It's different from regular sex because it feels like he's going way deeper. Anal doesn't help me orgasm more easily, though.
We maybe do it once every couple of months. There's nothing fun about it for me.
It's not that it's painful, it's just mildly uncomfortable and really not my thing. The guy I was seeing wanted to do it, and I was resistant but eventually gave in.
He tried to put it in, but it just hurt too much. I don't think he used lube, and it's just really tight. Maybe I'd do it again with the right person if I had a lot of trust in him. Either way, it's not something at the top of my list. My high school sweetheart was raised strictly Catholic and was 'saving it for marriage. His being exceedingly well-endowed made taking it slowly and using plenty of lube the obvious choice.
The oddest thing I noticed was that the initial penetration would generate a tight sensation in my throat, similar to what you might feel after a bad scare. But it was an exciting feeling, not scary at all. It's a slow but pleasantly luxurious sensation of being gently and benignly pulled inside out. It certainly was extremely erotic, and I felt aware of my entire body as an erogenous zone.
I discovered I was able to orgasm via anal penetration, and anal play is something I enjoy to this day.
At one point in high school, I was having more anal than regular sex. He feels bigger than ever and completely fills you up. That means lots of lube, starting small with a pinky finger just like in Fifty Shadesthen working your way up to small toys or butt plugs. After that, anal can be amazing! It is super-intense, and your lover has to be extremely delicate and careful and be a good listener and super patient—and you as the receiver have to have a lot of trust in that.
The anus is, after all, an exit, not an entrance, and so it could really, really hurt. This is not an act that should ever be undertaken with a random dude or at a random moment; you both have to want it, and you both have to be prepared. No assholes allowed in the asshole! I think that's one of the best parts of the whole ordeal. It takes so much time, trust, and communication that it just amplifies everything physical going on because you are so connected with your partner.
Lots of lube, slow, gentle motions, and patience move it quickly to the next phase, which is an exciting, pleasurable pressure. I find that I can have stronger orgasms while being penetrated anally, but these are clitoral or vaginal orgasms, not anal orgasms—those are quite elusive.
For me, it's probably the added stimulation, the intimacy, and the emotional intensity of anal that make orgasms stronger. But if the angle is wrong in anal sex, with too much of a sharp upward or downward angle, a sting-y and unpleasant pain can be the result.
Having the right angle of entry is important for me. Also, pegging someone with a strap-on can be very pleasurable with an insert-able double-ended dildo, or even just the harness or base of the strap-on grinding up against the clitoris. Weight Loss. United States. Type keyword s to search. Today's Top Stories. Masala Pepper And Cauliflower Omelet. If you've yet to add anal to the menu but are curious to taste test it, there are some things you should know first: Try anal training. If you're worried about tearing or pain, you can work your way up to full-blown anal by starting with a butt plug, anal beor fingers.
The biggest challenge, she says, is getting the sphincter to relax enough for something to penetrate it. Don't stress, it's not unusual for it to take a few tries. But when you feel your sphincter relax whether it's a toy, finger, or penis coming through, you'll know you're ready. Lube, lube, lube.
To make things way more comfortableremember that lube and lots of it is your best friend. So it'll need a little extra help from a store-bought friend to make the experience smoother. Parks recommends water-based lubes since anything petroleum- or oil-based will break down the materials in your condom if you're wearing one or a silicon strap-on. Prep the pipes.
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Anal douching is always available to you, but your best bet is just going poop before the act. If you're having trouble, Parks says to try an herbal supplement or tea such as Smooth Move that goes easy on the stomach. Talk it out. Be sure to communicate with your partner about how you're feeling when it comes to anal. If something doesn't feel right: stop!
Even after the act, Parks says the conversations should continue. Check in afterward and ask your partner what they thought of the experience, how it made them feel, and what they might like to do differently next time. Cleanliness is key. If you're planning to transition from anal to vaginal sex, be sure to thoroughly clean yourself in between, especially if you're not using a condom you can change, says Parks.