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If you struggle to find a boyfriend, it is likely that whatever you tried up to this point to meet guys is not working for you. Times have changed and most couples meet online and if you are not taking advantage of online dating it might be the reason why you are still single.

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Listen now: Oprah tells Hoda how she keeps three close friendships. It's not always an easy task! Consequently, many singles are enlisting the help of professional cupids whose business is bringing together compatible couples. Today's matchmakers work hard for their money—and they demand a lot of it.

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Most women date badly, so if you follow these simple steps you will naturally put yourself in a position to get a boyfriend… Fast. And dating is even more so. Well, Data shows environments with more women make men lazy and entitled.

Here are a few s of availability without looking easy:. Not even the best womanizers can hit on an hidden woman… Let alone normal guys. They stare at a guy, smile, talk to their girlfriend and then look at him again… They give me all the typical s of interest. But they never move from sitting in their big circles of friends! Be smarter instead:. The idea of going out is to increase your chances. If you do any of the following, your chances plummet:. Not the bad kind at least allow me at least one bad joke per article :. The solution? Tell everyone your colleagues are lovely. But just as friends.

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It will make you seem more precious and lower the pressure for guys to ask you out. And when you go out, the more informal dates will give you a better chance of assessing them for who they really are. Oh, because of course, to hell that rule, you never meant it to begin with. Which net catches the best fishes?

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The wide one! I remember laughing once at the online description of a Tinder profile:.

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But while we keep that dream alive, be realistic as well. Hope for the best but also cast your net as wide as possible and you will get as many boyfriends candidates as possible. And many great men might not even approach at all. Why should miss on those?

And of course, there are many high quality men who are too busy to go to lots of social events.

Plus, as Hussey says in Get The Guythe guys who are most likely to approach you are also more likely to be players. And too smooth an approach can be a of a womanizer. The paradox of choice if a well known phenomenon which says that, in front of many options, we end up unhappy and without picking anything.

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Modernity is a huge dating paradox of choice. Urban life, dating apps and social media make us feel as if there are good men everywhere. Hollywood movies and advertising further raise our expectation beyond reality. And the more time goes by, the fewer there will be math says so! Emotions are contagious. And honesty is refreshing. Scarcity does up your value … Up to a very limited point.

But unavailable games are also often abused and misused. I talk about it more in depth in 7 biggest mistakes women make in dating. For here, suffice to say that if you really wanna use scarcity, tweak it like this:. Now you communicated scarcity -if you really need to do that- plus showed him the light at the end of the tunnel. And you built him up. Plus a honest gal is so refreshing! But after she sent me that message? Not once in history did a woman get a boyfriend by canceling a date. The reason is deeply psychological -and scientific. But we met quick and things just happened.

Some other times I have had an amazing first encounter with a woman. Then something happened that we had to reschedule the date. And we never met again example below. We missed the first try. Missed the second too. And it never happened. The spark is great. Aziz in his book The Tao of Dating talks about a girlfriend of his who had just been on a great date. The two daters talked for the whole night and they had so much in common. The reason? There was no spark. But The spark is cr p as a predictor of long lasting love and of commitment.

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Me and this woman had a great spark. With lots of fireworks soon after, too.

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And see how it ended:. Love is often like developing your passion : it builds over time. People who feel the butterflies are often anxious attachment type dating an avoidant attachment type. However, in my experience, this is a minority of women in the west. The whole dating advice industry is built on two often wrong fundamentals:.

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Both work, but almost nobody says they work only in specific scenarios and, often, with the wrong kind of guys. If you want to get a boyfriend fast, I recommend you do the opposite. Look at this woman how she sped up the dating while also dropping games and while also showing me a lesson and taking control of the dating process :.

Life is a tango. Bruce Bryan in his great Never Chase Men Again says that high quality men have little tolerance for egocentric women. Asking for the moon will not make you sound like a prize, but like an entitled princess on a pea and entitlement is a typical trait of low quality women.

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One step him, one step you. He comes towards you, you move further towards him. He does something nice, you do something nice back. For example, invite him home where you have a home cooked dinner with a top wine, candles and all. Some best-seller dating books would want you to behave as if you never wanted a relationship in a million year.

Some other books swung the opposite direction and would want you to ask for a relationship before sex. What The Solution?

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And standards are a of quality. We were already intimate, and the fact we were having a great time together was all leverage for her to come up with that very early -like 3rd date or so. Or get off the range. But it would be beyond the scope of this article.

For now, congrats :. Then later you can start reading on relationship theory here and on practical applications here.

Sources : While this article is primarily my opinion, it is also based on copious amount of dating ad vise I investigate, lots of personal experience, years and years of observation and a deeper than average knowledge of psychology and sociology. Username or Address. Remember Me. Consider this article a quick primer on effective dating.

Contents 1. Take Care of Yourself 2. Send Available als 4.